What do you want to be when you grow up

I’m still in that process. Well, I mean I am still learning, still developing my skills.

Can you honestly say that you’ve covered everything on your favorite subject of interest?

Well, I haven’t. And it’s totally fine. I love exploring, learning new things (it also goes for domains I had no interference with before), trying my limits.

I do not know – or maybe I have so many people to mention that I must dedicate an entire article in their honor – what made me like this. But I have always tried more, being curious, asking questions, and giving things a try just to see the outcome.

Speaking of I don’t know… well, that cup I received from a former student is always something that takes me back to my first ‘what ifs’, every time I look at it.

I guess it's all a matter of skills. Developing some old skills and acquiring new ones, that is. I never knew I had it in me to be a teacher. It's just that it happened and I enjoyed it, being around children, teaching them, playing with them (playing and learning, quoting here Ross on his childhood and playing with dinosaurs figures), and having fun. It was a skill that brought me to being a teacher, and so another one developed.

Years later, another skill brought me to the position of proofreader, and here a couple of skills emerged. It was not seeing my name on the cover of a book that made me think I want to be a writer; it was actually that great feeling one gets when one creates something, and releases it and sees afterwards that it brings joy and excitement to others. 

A writer needs to know that what she/ he writes is read. Whether it causes positive or negative reactions, it does not matter. The only fact that the written word is read and gets a reaction is what makes the writer believe that the creative process was not in vain and keeps her/ him writing (although the advice is to write, to send it to be published, to forget about it being read or not, being appreciated or not, and to write some more). 

I never knew I could sew. I saw it all the time in my home, my mom was doing it, my sister was doing it, even my father did it. I guess thread and needle were a thing back then. I wonder how many of us still use the thread in order to sew a button on a shirt, and not throw the shirt away and buy a new one (I guess that was the main subject of a play called 'Should we wash the kid or do we make another one?!'; I wouldn't know, I've never seen it). I guess it all started with an old pair of jeans that I could not afford to throw away. I made embroideries on it, and so I started making DIY projects (which I had no idea they were called like that back then). Afterwards, I started blogging, and one of them is dedicated to my DIY projects. 

The idea of this article was not to brag about the wonderful skills I possess, though you might be under that impression. I reckon that what I wanted to convey was the simple message that we should not limit ourselves. Skills may be acquired, and perfection does not exist. Or if you're clinging to that, each project can be perfect and thus it cannot be compared to others. 

So take this gift of time that we're given nowadays to think about your skills, about the things you once wished you did but just never got quite around to doing it, about what you can do, but most of it, about what you always thought you were incapable of doing and give it a mere try. 

Find and replace

While I was working as a proofreader in a publishing house, I had the chance to share my office with a very special lady, a professional, who was willing to share her knowledge. Maybe it is because of her that I learnt the most beautiful lesson of them all – if you know something, the best you can do is to share that knowledge, it’s this way that the circle is complete. And since I had years of experience being a teacher, her lesson touched fruitful land.

In life, I reckon it is important to find models, whether we search for them or not. Those Eureka moments are, without a doubt, chances for one to feel one’s brain alive, especially since it is a conscious way to meet it and see what those neurons are all about. Quoting Chandler, when do you ever feel your brain (of course, paraphrasing, because for that particular moment Chandler was referring to Joey’s ears – and yes, Friends series will always be a reference)?

Well, this particular lady I am referring to taught me a lot, much of the things being related to the errors that we make while writing or pronouncing: drawing pin (piuneză in Romanian), location (locație in Romanian), and the most important lesson of them all – find and replace command.

I always enjoyed Romanian classes, though I never was a brilliant student. But I must admit that, throughout the years, I have become somewhat of a Ross to the persons in my life. It came as a realization when I heard my husband, sitting in the dentist’s chair, saying the following: ‘Oh, I must correct what I have just said, otherwise my wife will judge me for this cacophony’.

Well, both drawing pin and location had been used incorrectly by me. Some people have it in them, that gentleness, in order for one to not be ashamed of oneself for saying something wrong. Something that encourages one to keep coming back with questions, concerns or curiosities. I absolutely adore these people. Rightfully, statues should be erected in their honor. This lady told me about the correct form of the aforementioned words, and ever since I have being correctly using those words even though I received funny looks.

I remember when everybody started using the word location. It sounded fancy and we all loved using it. But when I found out that in Romanian the meaning was rent, I started paying more attention to the words in fashion and always looked for guidance on the dexonline site. Again, paraphrasing our president – it’s better to be prepared than to not be prepared.

The greatest trick was when I found out about the command Ctrl + H (find and replace). Well, when you work with pages and pages in Word you better know some tricks. But aside from its main function, I do believe that sometimes find and replace can do miracles – giving one directions for cleansing. I guess everything can do with a little brushing up, whether it’s information or just simply replacing the old and not functioning anymore with the new.

I get it, sometimes I may go the extra mile and see things that are not exactly there due to my writing as vocation. But what if, starting from today, we put this command to great justice. Wouldn’t that be great to make sure we find and replace all those things that are not working for us anymore?!

I took an easy step. By starting with replacing coffee with Masala tea, I apply other criteria when buying books and starting exploring other domains (well, not quantum physics).

What about you? If you used this command, what would you replace and with what would make the replacements?

'Cusătoresele' (The Sewing Club). Two years since the book launch.

The book launch was a success. It was so nice that I wish I wasn't so nervous and that I could remember everything that was said, and especially everthing that made us laugh. Because there was laughter. A lot. And so because three wonderful ladies spoke at the event, artfully knowing how to combine text and life analysis.

Why should you read 'The Sewing Club'?
Well, I think you cannot be convinced only with the fact that it is well written, it has a special structure and you will not get the feeling that you are wasting your time reading it. 
Or that it presents new, but old subjects (things that everybody talks about, but only around the corners). And that Dan's discoveries will amuse you.

To be frank, I don't think I can be objective when it comes to this novel. But I must state the following and I am pretty sure that this might convince you into reading the novel 'The Sewing Club' - this is a novel that has been waiting for a while now to be written. And it has. 
By all means, please read it. You will agree with me afterwards.

Life without a smartphone

I don’t own a smartphone. Instead, my phone has buttons and is yellow. A treat to the eyes, indeed.

Now, I am not trying to put the foundation to a new religion (even though seeing that Kanye West has gone religious, why shouldn’t I?!), but after having read Matt Haig’s Notes on a Nervous Planet, I realized that people are in search of ways to try to tone down their everyday stress.

So keep reading. And I promise to also tell you a funny story about this ‘no-smartphone deal’ experience.

First thing’s first. Years ago, I was madly attached to my flipping phone and was not interested in changing it with a smartphone (even though I was given an opportunity). But when it broke, I opted for another classic mobile phone, in spite of the fact that around me people were using smartphones.

Well, to sum it up. The main reason that I chose a classic phone over a smartphone is that I have high expectations of my time. I must spend it in a useful manner and realized that a smartphone will get in the way (especially now with some many apps and even more notifications).

Sure, I have friends around who use smartphones and I see both the disadvantages but also the advantages. But I rather use my phone for only calls and messages, without having to stay connected that much to a screen. Either way, we’re spending our time doing our jobs by staring at a screen, and then at home we have other screens to change that with (our computers, our TVs, etc.).

I consider it being important to disconnect. To free oneself from notifications, alerts, emergencies, calls, emails… Even I do that during the weekends, when I usually keep the phone in another room than the one I’m in and only log at the end of the weekend to the accounts I have on social media.

How do I manage? Well, it’s simple. If I need to get somewhere, I put directions on a piece of paper and always arrive at the destination (should you need me for treasure hunting, you can count on me). I use Google to search for things, just like any other mortal, I watch videos and I read and reply to emails but only on computers. I’m an organizing freak, so I tend to schedule most of my posts on my pages and blogs, so no issue here, either. I guess it’s all a matter of priorities. You do what you can in order to make sure that you cater for them.

I think the best thing about not having a smartphone is that when you are in a meeting or you’re with friends, it’s easier to give them an undivided attention since you’re not always distracted by notifications and alerts. A more person-to-person encounter, if you like.

And quoting Ross, by not having a smartphone I feel like I’ve been given the gift of time and I’m doing all that I can to make sure I cherish it.

Try it (well, not necessary to get rid of your smartphone; but I would definitely recommend disconnecting once in a while)!

P.S. That funny story is as follows: we were talking with my colleagues about new available gadgets, and one insisted on the fact that I must have a smartphone at home (and parade this yellow bundle of joy just to make an impression). Otherwise, how could I be so much in the know with the latest technological innovations?! It amuses me that the fact of not having a smartphone these days is unthinkable. But that does not necessary imply that if you don’t own one, you don’t know what’s happening. I don’t live in a cave, I tell you. It’s just I like the yellow color and having my time my way.

Bottled Goods - Sophie van Llewyn

I will never shy away from saying that if we do not look back to the past that paved the way for our present, we will never learn (be it as individuals, society, country or planet).
And I think we should always try to learn and always question the errors made in the past for they help us make things better.

There were two reasons that made me want to read this book.
One, it was longlisted for Women's Prize for Fiction in 2019.
Two, it was written by a Romanian-born author and it depicts the 1970s communist Romania.

This is the story of a married couple in search for freedom. Though we only get to learn Alina's side of the story, we understand that things are not that easy for Liviu either. Following the defection of his brother to the West, Liviu drowns his sorrows in alcohol, while Alina suffers numerous abuses.
Of great importance is the depiction of the power that the Secret Services and their officers had on ordinary people - not only for those who have lived that time, but also for those who have not for they should be able to better understand the context of the Communist regime.

Alina turns for comfort to her aunt and so the story starts showing magical realism elements. Fear cannot be understood unless lived, but when children raise against their parents and vice versa and the feeling that nobody can be trusted is growing stronger and stronger, that's a sign that stresses the fact that something is wrong and humanity is altered.

Do not be afraid of the past. Be afraid of the fact that you might live it unless you open the eyes to the mistakes that made it!

10 Minutes 38 Seconds in This Strange World - Elif Shafak

There is nothing more beautiful than starting the year with a good book. Even though the adjective does not do it justice, I insist to keep it for I am always asked to recommend a good book.

I have heard before of Elif Shafak, but I have kept myself away (like I always do when a writer is too much promoted and I somehow wait for her/ his fame to set in in order to be able to rejoice in her/ his book rather than in her/ his reputation).

'10 Minutes 38 seconds in This Strange World' is a manifest for tolerance. There are in this book so many references towards religion, sex, society, way of living, education, nationality, ethnicity, color of the skin, and all of them have different valences. Enough to open the minds, even just a little bit, upon them. If I may I will paraphrase the sacred teachings: those who have their minds prepared will understand.

In a nutshell, the book recounts the last 10 minutes and 38 seconds of Leila's cerebral activity, after her assassination. Tastes and odors apparently accidentally chosen by the brain, take us through important moments of Leila's life.

Each memory is like a link in a chain, bonded by friendship. People say that we cannot choose our family, but we can choose our friends. And, sometimes, it turns out that friends are even more loyal than the members of a family. Five, in Leila's case. Five loyal friends who are there for her even after her death.

Sexual violence against minors is, in fact, a stand-alone thread in the woven of the story. The framework in which it appears, humans' attitude towards it, and also the impact it has on its victims and the society, are minutely described, without drawn conclusions or recommendations. Actually, in this lies the beauty of the book. There are no conclusions or recommendations. Everyone is free to draw their own conclusions, if they such wish, and teachings.

And speaking of freedom, Martin Luther King. Jr.'s speech acquires extraordinary meanings in this book, playing the role of a gardian-angel to the main character. Leila had seen the speech as a kid, and at the moment of her own liberation, the circle closes with the uplifting words:
'Free at Last!'

Terracotta fireplaces

It’s not that this is secret information. It’s just that some of you do not really know me that well in order to be aware of the fact that I absolutely adore terracotta fireplaces.

It all began when I was small, and visited my grandparents’ house. And maybe I fancy terracotta fireplaces that much because they remind me of a time when I had no cares in the world, I ate popcorn and fruits from the trees, and a dog was barking in the background.

I remember a talk I had once with a former colleague about the weird things we would put in our homes. Mine was a terracotta fireplace. His was a bathtub in the living-room.

Throughout the years, I have proudly stated my interest in terracotta fireplaces, and still continue to dream about them. Every time we go to a place that has one, I am absolutely spellbound.

Living in an apartment that has its own heating system it seems absolutely ridiculous to have a terracotta fireplace. But I must add that I would be completely happy if I just had one in (even though that means not being able to use it). It would be a veritable eye-candy.

A couple of weeks ago, another former work-colleague sent me this link. These people from Medias terracotta factory are doing such wonderful work! It is absolutely inspiring!

It saddens me to know that this is the only factory that manufactures terracotta fireplaces in all Romania. And I am really wishing for it to have a long journey.

And if you’re admirers of true handcraft and beautiful things, you should visit this site.

For me, this is the most beautiful of them all. Ah, the wonder!

(property of teracota.ro)